Goodbye HoJo, I Thought You Had Already Died

“Little roadside restaurant we artfully complain, Rudy tells the waitress that his chicken died in vain” – Opening Lyrics of Jimmy Buffett’s Coast of Carolina

Earlier in the week I made note of the passing of the last, orange roofed, Howard Johnson’s restaurant. Once it boasted hundreds of restaurants along with motels. First the motels were sold off to Marriott, who later sold them themselves. The restaurants were closed until there was only one left standing in St. George, New York. I was surprised to learn that it still existed. I also noted that as a child I referred to it as Howard and Johnson’s. Stupid kid thoughts.

Yes, “Another baby-boomer icon has bitten the dust. The last remaining Howard Johnson’s restaurant, the orange-roofed baby-boomer favorite known for fried clams and twenty-eight flavors of ice cream including both peanut and pecan brittle, shut its doors, bringing down the curtain on a chain that once boasted 1,000 locations across the nation, the Times Union reported. The outlet, in Lake George, New York, closed this spring after almost 70 years.”

I am a baby-boomer, but I am not a gourmet of wine or food…I don’t speak French either. I do know what I like, and Howard Johnson’s was never what I liked…ice cream not included. I can’t remember any ice cream I didn’t like.

I ‘m certainly am not making a definitive epicurean review but when I hear the lyric, “Rudy tells the waitress that his chicken died in vain,” several restaurants come to mind, HoJo being one of them along with the cafeteria style S & S my father and brother and I frequented when we visited my mother in the State Hospital in Columbia.

My mother was part of a study of ALS, known as Lou Gerig’s Disease, at the state mental hospital, less than affectionally known as the crazy house. Our Sunday visit lunch choice was the S & S. I do not have fond memories of the S & S, but it is more about the death of my mother than their food offerings. Well, there was their green Jell-O salad.

Cafeteria style right down to the plastic plates and glasses. Good, cheap food…well cheap at least. With their different food choices and ambiance, I shouldn’t equate HoJo’s and S & S to each other, except their “facture de tarif” should have been accompanied by a gastric SOS. Facture de tarif is bill of fare, but I had to look it up.

Howard Johnson’s died due to the fast-food industry and the lifestyles we are forced to live. Most of us don’t have the means or the time to sit down for even a cafeteria style meal. There are other restaurants that died too, thanks to the fast-food hamburgers and fried chicken…along with some of their fans as ground beef patties fried in fat clogged their arteries.

The first hamburger chain in the States was White Castle opened in 1921. It was opened by Billy Ingram and Walter Anderson who started with the first White Castle restaurant in Wichita in 1916. They had a small menu which had cheap, square shaped hamburgers and they sold them in large numbers. The first franchises appeared in 1921 (A&W Root Beer franchised their syrup) and the first restaurant franchise appeared in the 1930s by Howard Johnson.

Johnson didn’t know he was contributing to the eventual demise of his restaurant and honestly it didn’t begin to snowball until the Fifties when the American love for cars became associated with suburbs, drive-ins and in my part of the world, the Hardee’s fifteen cent hamburger that made its appearance during the Fifties and Colonel Sanders’ KFC sold its first franchise in1952.

As bad as I thought Howard Johnson’s food was, it didn’t die because of its chicken dying in vain. It was American lifestyle changes. Well, the chicken might have contributed.

I do feel remorse that another symbol of my youth is gone even though the orange roof had been previously forgotten by me. I also regret all fast food doesn’t taste like Burger King hamburgers smell. But then Burger King hamburgers don’t taste like they smell.

May all your fast-food hamburger patties be larger than the pickle slice topping it and may you not die of a heart attack from eating them.

A little live Buffett for your listening enjoyment. No, not Cheeseburger in Paradise.

Don’s author’s page may be found at https://www.amazon.com/Don-Miller/e/B018IT38GM?fbclid=IwAR3Gpuu1x2MckONqCD6fIVcrtZbn6FG4595ZSgRqE2sDiwZAzECxvPAF7lI

“If the Earth is Flat, Why is My Life Going Downhill Consistently?”

 

No, I don’t believe the Earth is flat but at my age, I need all the gravitational help I can get just to motivate myself…that might have been more figurative than physical…or not.

I saw the title on a stupid meme in and amongst other stupid memes I read today.  I  was perusing them due to lack of gravitational motivation as I waited for a friend to load and haul away my tractor.  The tractor must be a product of flat earth science.   For some reason, the meme resonated and sent me down a pig trail in my mind.

Did I just accuse Flat Earthers of being stupid?  No, I just don’t agree with their particular brand of science.  The meme did seem more of an attempt at humor…unlike others I’ve seen recently.  I’ve got to where I can’t recognize humor anymore.  Many people are posting propaganda so bizarre it should be humor.  I find their beliefs so sad.  Biggly so.  Don’t you people ever do any research?

Image result for flat earth meme

People are posting memes as truth that appears to have come from the Weekly World News.  What a severed leg didn’t hop its way into a hospital emergency room?  Duck hunters didn’t shoot down an angel?  I did see an old headline that gave me pause, “Face of Satan Seen Over US Capitol.”  Yeah, that one had me wondering but didn’t he land in Viet Nam?  It did say over and not in.

I enjoyed the Weekly World News. RT @AcidEater_Fusao: Face of Satan and Jesus #WeeklyWorldNews https://t.co/DRaW8QZXsd

I called someone on an untruth.  A derogatory meme directed at a millennial.  I posted, with citing, how untrue it was.  My time spent at research didn’t matter and my attempt to win friends and influence enemies went for naught.  His mind was made up and didn’t want to be confused with the facts.  His logic, “If she didn’t say what was attributed, she had said something else equally as stupid.”  My belief is she is everything my friend fears; a strong female, educated, and brown.

I saw a quote further pushing me down my pig trail…I thought about my children and grandchildren and generations to come.  I recognized it wasn’t humor.  A quote by Cicero, the Roman statesmen just before he was assassinated in 43 BCE or for those of you who think there is some cabal attempting to eliminate Christianity, 43 BC.  Anyway, his quote was made the same year as his death, “Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.”  My thought was that two thousand and sixty-three years later I could make the same quote. I won’t because a small part of me believes there might be a correlation between the quote and his assassination…and I’m writing another book.

I can’t deny that “some” children seem rude and disrespectful.  They seem to be the only ones we focus on.  We don’t seem to want to focus on all the young folks that are doing wonderful things.   They don’t seem to be worthy of our time nor do they fit our discordance.

“Well, there aren’t any are there?”  Good kids I mean.  After all, the youth of today are liberally educated (another term for stupid I guess), unmotivated, lazy, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, ad nauseum.”  No, I don’t believe that. I believe there is youth, in great numbers, who are educated, motivated, with a great work ethic…and damn your damnation of liberal education.  Their sin is they do it differently than we did.  They must do it differently, the world of today is different and despite your best efforts, will continue to change…as it always has.

The loudest shouts seem to be coming from my own generation.  The same late baby boomers who thought go go boots and granny glasses were cool.  As children, chased after trucks emitting fumes to kill mosquitoes.  We broke our ankles wearing platform shoes as teens and college students, played with sea monkeys while bouncing super balls to the light of a Lava lamp.  Should I leave out dropping acid and smoking weed while making love, not war?   Say nothing Gen Xers, two words, “The Mullet.”

mullet meme | Go ahead, bro..., Mullet over.

It’s almost as if the Boomers and Gen Xers think the world is going to hell as soon as we cross over to wherever we cross over too.  The world will probably end not due to the present generation but due to our own blindness and stupidity…and our greed.

Before the sun sets for the last time on humanity and if the present generation is so stupid, who are you going to get to program your next phone, remote or computer software?

Image result for old folks programing phone meme

Today’s generation is different…the same way we were different than the previous one.  Our parents thought we were headed for nothing, but they pushed and prodded.  They instilled a belief we could be better than they were and some of us were.  It seems to me that many of my generation and the next have forgotten that, choosing instead to malign and accuse rather than build.  We sit back on our ivory thrones and shake our heads and point fingers.  We discount different as stupid, that thinking outside of the box is somehow a communist plot.  To have a different thought is to commit treason.  We view a mistake as impossible to overcome and return repeatedly to point it out, picking at it until it bleeds.  I remember how we going to change the world.  We did, but I’m not sure if it was for the good of future generations.

I’m not going use a paintbrush and broadly stroke anyone,  but the complaints seem to be coming from one group and it is not the Flat Earthers.  They are friends desperately attempting to hold on to what is comfortable, the status quo, or attempting to return to the perceived good old days, “those thrilling days of yesteryear.”  Embracing an Earth that is all sharp angles instead of rounded corners.

For more foolishness go to Don Miller’s author’s page at https://www.amazon.com/Don-Miller/e/B018IT38GM

The title  “If the Earth is Flat, Why is My Life Going Downhill Consistently?” came from a meme at https://www.pinterest.ca/alfiepancakezz/

Title Image http://trn.trains.com/railroads/2013/07/lustig-movie-review

2nd. Image  https://braincharm.com/2018/06/29/26-flat-earth-memes-to-send-to-your-friends-that-think-the-world-isnt-round/

3rd. Image https://www.scoopnest.com/tag/WeeklyWorldNews/

4th. Image https://www.diylol.com

5th. Image https://www.pinterest.com/nerdybff/tech-jokes/?lp=true